What causes ADHD?
Or a better question would be, How can a kid be diagnosed as ADHD in one environment (mom’s house) and be perfectly fine, with NO ADHD symptoms in another environment (dad’s house).
In Ben’s case, it’s real simple to understand.
Shelly (Ben’s mom) has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and is on a lot of medications herself. In her situation, the drugs mess her up more than the so called “disorder” itself.
Below are some quotes from her personal journal. These are words that she personally wrote, describing how messed up she is and how she isn’t able to take care of Ben….
“It seems like I’m constantly getting onto Benjamin. Of course, I worry if I’m giving him enough attention. I’m so unhappy most of the time. I’m sure it rubs off on him.”
“I just get more and more pissed off. My mind races. I cant seem to make decisions. I just wander around like I’m lost, or that’s how I feel in my head. I’m “acting” all day long. What I truly feel like is coming completely out of my skin. Everything is confusing.”
“Ben takes so much, he’s so difficult right now. I know it’s because I can’t or don’t give him the attention he needs.”
“I sometimes feel like I don’t have control of my thoughts.”
“I slipped into a very dark day. Cried all day, neglected Ben.”
“Aside from my messed up mind, I’m healthy.”
“More of the same today. I had a horrible morning. I think I scared Ben.”
“I wish I could just fly away and never come back or go die somewhere. I’m never happy, this is all so hard. I think of dying every day.”
“I’m so confused, my brain seems rattled. I’m paranoid and sensitive. I’ve been crying every day. This is so hard. I really feel like the living dead.”
“I’m so uncomfortable, my mind races. It’s exhausting. Thoughts of suicide penetrate my mind. It’s scary. I cried most of the day yesterday. Ben deserves better than that.”
“I feel like bugs are crawling under my skin and that I’m hanging on by my fingernails. It’s all in my head but that’s where I need to feel better. Every day is a struggle.”
“Shit, I’m having those black days again. Yesterday and today, I’m very tired of it. I’m crying off and on all day – totally sleeping. Right now I feel – confused – tired – very sad. I keep sleeping hoping it passes. I seriously am not interested in anything. I couldn’t take care of Ben.”
Is it possible that ANY kid would come out of that sort of home environment “normal”.
Do you think that just maybe being a kid in an environment like this might have some effects on your mental health?
The way to correct the problem isn’t to give a kid mind-numbing drugs so that he can deal with the environment.
The way to fix it is to remove the kid from the environment until his mother can get the help that she truly needs.